An insight, unedited:
When we push people away during the hard times, are we in denial?
If I let you hold me, it means something is wrong. And I don't want anything to be wrong, I don't want to be in this pain, I want to fine. So treat me as if I am, and we can all pretend effectively.
So much of ourselves is 'made' by how other people treat us.
And we rail against it when everything's fine, but when it's not, do we use this as a tool?